Nine Ways to Make Your Sentences Instantly Better
The KidLit Creator’s Chronicle – Issue #39
We’ve all had this experience: you’re excited to write your story, you write your draft, you work on improving it, you read it over… and it doesn’t sound right. You work on it some more, but some sentences just don’t work. They’re bland, unclear, too flowery… and you can’t figure out how to fix them.
Maybe they get the job done, i.e. they make sense and convey the idea. But they’re flat. They don’t bring your story to life. Instead of painting vivid scenes or stirring emotion, they read like a secondhand retelling, as though someone is summarizing a story rather than immersing the reader in it.
Or, often, writers have almost the opposite problem. The sentences are too flowery, and instead of supporting and painting the story, all your attention goes to the words themselves.
Writing great sentences that flow off the tongue and bring the moment to life is a skill you can learn. Especially in picture books, every sentence counts. With only a few hundred words to work with, each one has to carry its weight.
Whether you’re revising a story right now or still figuring out how to start, the strategies in this edition will help you write sentences that sound better and make your writing evocative.
How Strong Sentences Transform Your Writing
You already know the big things matter, like plot, a relatable character, and a satisfying resolution.
We spend a lot of time wrestling with those, and rightly so.
But sentences can seem secondary. Yet, sentences are the way your reader experiences your world. Your sentences are the story’s voice and tone.
Some sentences carry meaning, some carry rhythm, and some carry emotion. Some do all three.
When you stack strong sentences together, the whole book sings.
So if you’ve ever looked at your draft and thought, It’s not bad, but it’s missing something… it might not be the story. It might be the sentences.
Today’s strategies will help you write sentences that:
- read beautifully aloud,
- flow smoothly together,
- pack more meaning into fewer words, and
- come alive in a child’s imagination.
Let’s take a look at how to do exactly that.
Nine Ways to Make Your Sentences Instantly Better
1. Write for the ear, not just the eye
(This applies specifically to picture books, but can actually be surprisingly helpful for other genres too.)
This is one of the fastest ways to spot sentences that don’t work well. Read your manuscript out loud, and if you stumble, run out of breath, or get tongue-tied, chances are your reader will too. Picture books are read aloud, so even if it looks right on the page, it has to sound right and be easy to read aloud.
And more than just being able to read it, it has to sound interesting, keep attention, and bonus points if it’s also fun or beautiful to listen to. Flat or clunky sentences can drain the energy from your whole story, even if the idea is strong.
Examples:
“I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. I know I can.”
– The Little Engine That Could
“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not.”
– The Lorax
2. Use sentence variety to create rhythm and flow
Too many short, choppy sentences in a row can feel like a drumbeat that never changes. Too many long ones can make the text feel sluggish. Really, any sections of text where all the sentences are more or less the same length tend to become boring. What you want is a mix: short, medium, and the occasional long sentence to keep the reader engaged. But it’s not just length. Try to vary how your sentences begin. Starting every line with “He…” or “She…” or “There was…” makes your writing predictable. Instead, begin with a time marker (“Today, I felt brave.”), a dependent clause (“When the rain came, she danced anyway.”), or a rhythmic trio (“He wiggled, squirmed, and rolled across the floor”).
This kind of variation keeps the reading experience dynamic. It also helps children (and adults) stay attuned to your story’s flow.
Example:
“The night Max wore his wolf suit and made mischief of one kind and another, his mother called him “WILD THING!” and Max said, “I’LL EAT YOU UP!” So he was sent to bed without eating anything.” (28 words, then 9 words)
– Where the Wild Things Are
3. Make each sentence connect to the one before it
Sentences don’t stand alone. Each one is part of a chain and needs to connect intentionally to the sentence before it. When revising, look at your sentences in pairs. Do they mirror each other in tone, length, or structure? If so, maybe the second one needs to break that pattern to hold interest. Does the second sentence simply repeat what the one before it was saying? If so, rethink it, unless the repetition is deliberate. If the first one builds tension, does the next one release it or escalate it further?
Even small changes, like shifting sentence order or swapping a comma for a full stop, can dramatically improve how your story feels as it’s read.
Example:
“Once there was a little bunny who wanted to run away.
So he said to his mother, “I am running away.”
“If you run away,” said his mother, “I will run after you, for you are my little bunny.”
– Runaway Bunny
4. Choose strong, specific verbs
Most first drafts use the obvious verbs: “went,” “was,” “looked,” “did.” But strong verbs are crucial for strong sentences. They add colour, emotion, even humour, often without needing extra words.
Instead of “The fire went out,” try “The fire choked into darkness.”
Instead of “Leaves covered the ground,” try “Leaves carpeted the ground.”
The stronger verbs paint a much more vibrant picture.
Don’t overcomplicate it. This isn’t about fancy vocabulary, and you don’t want to use (many) words that your readers won’t understand. The best verbs are still everyday words, just used with care. If your character is moving, feeling, reacting, or speaking, make sure that verb is vivid, not just a 10-cent basic verb.
Example:
“So Llama huffed and puffed…
… and squeezed and stuffed himself into the pants.”
– Llama Destroys the World
5. Add interest with one vivid word (when it makes sense)
One can use a power word in every sentence, but for children’s books that can be too much. Read over your manuscript, line by line, and see if one word could elevate that sentence. A word that surprises the reader or gives the sentence a new emotional edge. In the sentence “She had a laugh like windchimes,” the word windchimes is unexpected. It adds sound, tone, and personality. Add these words in your own writing, and if you find yourself using two or three adjectives to get there, it’s usually a sign that one stronger noun or verb could do the job better.
Example:
“And now,” cried Max, “Let the wild rumpus start!”
– Where the Wild Things Are
6. Trim what you don’t need
Children’s books demand clarity, and that means trimming anything that clutters. This actually applies even for adult novels. Watch for filler words like “just,” “a bit,” “very,” “began to,” or “in order to.” You don’t need them. Instead of “He began to run,” write “He ran.” Instead of “They worked together as a team,” say “They worked as a team.” Or maybe just “They worked.”
Short sentences are allowed, and you should have some. A good three-word sentence in the right place can create punch, pace, and contrast.
Whether you’re writing a long sentence or a short sentence, you should always trim the fat.
“On Tuesday, he ate through two pears, but he was still hungry.”
– The Very Hungry Caterpillar
7. Cut visual descriptions
In picture books, illustration carries a large part of the storytelling. In middle grade and YA, the readers’ imagination plays the role of the illustrator. If you overdescribe, you leave little room for that imagination and slow the story down.
So this rule applies for every genre, it’s only the degree that varies.
Instead of describing colours, clothing, facial expressions, or settings in detail, focus your sentences on action, intention, or change. This instantly tightens your writing and, for picture books, gives the illustrator space to add magic.
A few key strategies you can employ:
- Description should serve the moment.
Description works best when it reveals something important, like mood, character, tension, or change, not when it lists unimportant details or what the reader can already infer. - Action scenes need momentum.
During high-stakes or fast-paced moments, heavy description slows the flow. Clear action and emotional moments matter more than visual detail. When needed, a single, clear descriptive line can do more than a paragraph of description. - Readers fill in the gaps.
Just as illustrators add magic in picture books, readers actively co-create scenes in their minds. Trusting them to do that makes the writing feel more to the point and immersive. - Overdescription flattens impact.
When everything is explained – every gesture, expression, or setting detail – nothing stands out. Selective detail creates contrast and emphasis.
So whether you’re writing a picture book or a novel, strong storytelling often comes from knowing what to leave out. Description isn’t about showing everything, it’s about choosing the right details at the right moments.
Example:
Sam and Dave Dig a Hole has almost no description. It’s mostly dialogue and action, with a handful of descriptive words:
“‘We need to keep digging,’ said Dave.
So they kept digging.
They took a break. Dave drank chocolate milk out of a canteen. Sam ate animal cookies he had wrapped in their grandfather’s kerchief.”
8. Front-load every sentence
Children process language one idea at a time, so your sentences need to make sense quickly. If the most important information comes too late, the reader can lose the thread before they reach the end. Strong sentences put the key action or idea near the beginning, then build from there. This doesn’t mean your writing has to be dull or blunt — it just means you’re being kind to your reader’s brain. Clear early meaning makes a sentence feel confident and easy, even when it’s doing something clever.
Weak: “In a town nestled deep in the snowy mountains, where a river burbled and stars blinked and night, lived a girl.”
Better: “A girl lived in a snowy mountain town, where a river burbled and stars blinked.”
9. Anchor abstract ideas in concrete actions
Abstract concepts like fear, pride, kindness, or jealousy don’t hit home well on their own in children’s books. Sentences become stronger when those ideas are shown through something a child can picture. Instead of telling us how a character feels, show what they do with their hands, their feet, or their body. Concrete actions give your sentences weight and clarity, and they also make the story more illustratable. If a sentence can be drawn, it usually works better for young readers.
“Then I will become a fisherman and catch you.”
– The Runaway Bunny
Simplicity is not a step down, it’s a craft choice
When you first start writing, it’s easy to fall into the trap of trying to “sound like a writer.” This usually leads to writing that’s too fancy or formal, too heavy on adjectives, and weighed-down sentences.
If your sentence dazzles adults in critique group but confuses a five-year-old, it’s not doing its job.
This doesn’t mean your sentences should all be short or plain. There’s a reason we fall in love with books like Come On, Rain! And Last Stop on Market Street. Beautiful, lyrical language can elevate a picture book when it serves the child’s experience.
The trouble comes when it becomes a performance. When a sentence starts to draw attention to itself, rather than what’s happening in the story. Or when word choice becomes about showing your vocabulary, instead of helping a child feel what your character feels.
You don’t need to flatten your voice or strip away style. But every sentence should work for the story, the audience, and the moment.
Sometimes the best sentence is just, “Don’t let the pigeon drive the bus.” 🙂
Trust simplicity when it works.
Over to You
Now it’s your turn. Try revising a few sentences in your current draft using one (or a few) of these strategies!
Then comment and let me know how it went! I’d love to hear from you.
Once you start paying attention at the sentence level, you’ll be amazed how quickly your writing improves.
I hope these strategies help heaps, and wishing you a wonderful start to 2026!
